Menegur secara berhikmah

Source : Utusan Malaysia On-Line

Thursday, 18 September 2008

By : Mohd. Farid Md. Alias

"...HIKMAH itu ertinya bijaksana. Berhikmah dalam membuat teguran itu bermaksud berusaha menggunakan kaedah terbaik dalam menyampaikan sesuatu teguran agar kumpulan sasaran dapat menerima serta melakukan perubahan berdasarkan teguran yang diberi. Di samping itu, adalah diharapkan teguran tersebut berhasil membawa lebih banyak kebaikan berbanding mudarat.

...Maka apabila sesuatu kesalahan itu ingin diperbetulkan, maka adalah baik untuk kita membincangkan kesalahan tersebut, dan bukannya menyentuh peribadi seseorang itu seperti melabelkannya secara rambang.

Suasana teguran itu juga mungkin bermanfaat jika berada dalam situasi kehadiran individu lain secara minimum, agar keaiban orang yang ditegur itu dapat terpelihara di samping menjaga kehormatannya. Hal ini juga mampu membuatkannya lebih terbuka dalam menerima teguran tersebut.

...Sesuatu teguran itu juga boleh dilakukan secara umum yang diuar-uarkan dalam sesuatu perhimpunan atau melalui media tetapi tanpa menyebut secara terperinci berkaitan butiran teguran itu...

--------------------------------------------------

From what we can read as the above article, it is our responsibility to advice other people who we think did wrong, but then, we have to investigate whether the news or rumor is true and the source of the news has an acceptable level of integrity.

After we are confirmed that we really need to advise that person/group of people, then we should spend some times to choose what is the best way to advice the guilty, and the best solution is to choose the action that will cause the least destruction to the guilty, and at the same time not involving any unrelated personnel, not humiliating the guilty, while making sure that the message is received by the guilty, offensively, reluctantly or free-willingly.

Usually, if the mistake are personal, the best way is to confront the guilty himself/herself/themselves and remind him about the mistake he already did. What i mean by confronting is not by posting a blog about the guilty and the mistake he did, but it is more to a face to face encounter, whether by a meet, a phone call, a message or anyway that involve no others but the two parties.

After that, it is up on the guilty on how he take that advise. If the 'adviser' is not satisfied with the result, he can try to consult the guilty once again or he could publish the case ANONYMOUSLY with the hope that the guilty will take appropriate action.

It is a noble action taken by the 'adviser', but always be careful not to overdo it as it might be blended with the elements of fitnah and ghibah. This is what I always found in blogs and posts all over the internet. Sad but true, some of the bloggers do not really care about the essence of blogging, which is 'tabligh' (to tell or to spread news to the others), 'fatonah' (intelectual and having scrupulousness) and 'siddiq' (honesty and integrity) but they get more excited if their posts and comments are read by a lot of people even if it is fused with the seed of lies, untruthfulness, negative assumptions on vague issues pertaining the guilty.

Whatever we do, just bear in mind that it is not a good practice to simply tell stories about other people with the intention to attack his personal life and to humiliate him in front of the public. What goes around comes around. We do not know whether our turn next or not. Sometimes, when we are too obsessed to find other people's mistake, we do not noticed that at the very same time, our own are vulnerable and obviously seen by others.

That's all for now, HAPPY BLOGGING. :)